10 Reasons I Am Repulsed by Bruce Springsteen;) or Lester Bangs’ Hypothesis

It's All About Me, Bruce Springsteen at work basking in the glow of his minions

It’s All About Me, Bruce Springsteen at work basking in the glow of his mindless minions

By Ryan Hilligoss, April 1, 2013

“If love is truly going out of fashion forever, which I do not believe, then along with our nurtured indifference to each other will be an even more contemptuous indifference to each others’ objects of reverence. I thought it was Iggy Stooge, you thought it was Joni Mitchell or whoever else seemed to speak for your own private, entirely circumscribed situation’s many pains and few ecstasies. We will continue to fragment in this manner, because solipsism holds all the cards at present; it is a king whose domain engulfs even Elvis’. But I can guarantee you one thing: we will never again agree on anything as we agreed on Elvis. So I won’t bother saying good-bye to his corpse. I will say good-bye to you.” Lester Bangs, Village Voice, August 29, 1977

Elvis has been dead for 35 years now and Lester Bangs, legendary rock critic and visionary, nailed it on the head. When he wrote those words, most listeners heard music in one of a few ways: recorded music on albums or 8 tracks played in the living room, radio, television, or in a live music setting. Hit the fast forward button on the ol’ cassette deck, and here we are living in Lester’s shadow as each of us, mostly alone, listen to whatever music we like, whenever and however through more devices than I can list including Sirius/XM, iTunes, ipods, ipads, computers, or, egads, even CDs amongst ones I have never even heard of. While we witness the fragmentation of listeners and popular music into far-ranging musicians in every style and sub genre possible, the crux of Bangs’ theory reigns true as not only do we not listen to a lot of the same music, but often times we feel a need to tear down other people at a personal level and their tastes as some sort of twisted rationalization of our own choices. And that is why I am choosing this time to break camp and cleanse myself of a passion that has gripped me for some time. Yes, today I say goodbye to what I once thought of as the ‘power and glory’ of the music of Bruce Springsteen.

Ryan Hilligoss, bedroom at Godfrey, Il 1984

Ryan Hilligoss, bedroom at Godfrey, Il 1984

I was ten years old in 1984 when my older, much cooler brother took me to my first rock and roll concert, Springsteen on the Born In The USA arena tour. This was before the album and tour turned into a woolly mammoth of shameless cult of personality. My memories are vague, but I was hooked from the start as I was juiced by the pounding music and delirious fans around me. As a kid, I must have thought, “Well if these people are going nuts like this, this guy must be doing something right.” As the years rolled by I purchased each album and went to one concert on each tour as it rolled through St.Louis. But I did not become a fanatic until 2008 when I saw Springsteen and the E Street Band on the Magic Tour play a now legendary show on a ‘hot august night’ in the Arch City. Since then, I have spent countless hours and days reading about Springsteen and his music, going to concerts, listening to his music, talking to friends about it and even writing about my obsession. In my quest to read about all things Springsteen, I recently stumbled across an enlightening, world view changing column written by phillymag.com writer Victor Fiorello in which he lists all the reasons he hates Bruce Springsteen and his music, fans and earring. I have now seen the light, and I have cast off the chains of totalitarianism and will start anew. Here are my reasons why.

#10 He’s been playing music for 47 years…. enough already

With a career that started at the age of 15 when he joined the Castilles, a local Jersey shore band named after bars of soap, and has stretched through 17 studio albums and ‘live’ and box sets, thousands of concerts, and millions of fans, it’s time to hang up those tired ass rock and roll shoes, or working boots in his case. Go play some boardwalk bingo or take a drive across the country in a rented RV like most people your age!

Springsteen driving a Chevy Bel Aire

Springsteen driving a Chevy Bel Aire

#9 The man cannot draw an audience of his own

Seems like at most concerts, Springsteen has to drag some poor schlub like Brian Fallon from Gaslight Anthem, Eddie Vedder, Mike Ness, or an oldie like Paul McCartney out on stage just to prop up his own tired act. Jesus, at the age of 62, can’t you make it through a 3 hour show on your own? Sheesh!!

#8 He loves Canadians, what else is there to say, eh? 

Springsteen and Neil Young

Springsteen and Neil Young

In the picture above, Springsteen is shown rehearsing with inveterate Canadian Neil Young during the 2004 Vote For Change tour. Springsteen once performed Glory Days on the David Letterman Show along with The World’s Most Dangerous Band which is fronted by Canadian Paul Shaffer. And Springsteen recently performed a cover version of Canadian rocker Bryan Adams Cuts Like a Knife during a fundraiser. Why all the concern with Canada’s impact on Springsteen? One word: socialized medicine. It’s a slippery slope from Canada’s national healthcare system to the gulags of Soviet prison camps, and one I don’t care to tread or be led down by any musician, no matter the greatness of his stage presence. Plus Canada has produced the light weight comedy of John Candy, Eugene Levy and Dan Akroyd. Doesn’t that speak for itself? And if you are still confused, just remember that in Canada, they call ham bacon. Take off eh?

#7 The ‘Mighty’ Max Weinberg….the man who brings the power night after night

Back in 1975 when original E Street drummer Vinnie ‘Mad Dog’ Lopez was asked to leave the band and temporary fill in Ernest ‘Boom’ Carter left with David Sancious to form their own band, Springsteen famously put an ad in the Village Voice for a new drummer. According to legend, Springsteen spent countless hours over weeks and months auditioning hundreds of drummers. And Weinberg was the best he could do? Jesus H Christ, wasn’t someone like Ginger Baker available? As evidenced in the video above, Weinberg has difficulty keeping the most basic beat and his ‘skills’ can be described as sophomoric at best. I’ve had broken clocks keep better time than this guy. It’s too bad a better drummer couldn’t be used or else the E Street Band might carry the label as one of the most powerful, legendary, booty shaking bands in rock and roll history.

#6 He married his backup singer

Springsteen onstage with wife Patti Scialfa

Springsteen onstage with wife Patti Scialfa

Not much to say here except, if he was going to get hitched to someone in the band, couldn’t it have been someone ‘we the fans’ prefer like Steven Van Zandt or Roy Bittan? I mean Springsteen and Bittan seem to have been destined for each other musically as with a few tinkles of the piano from Roy, fans all over the world know what song is coming. Springsteen has been known to say that when they are in the recording studio, he tries to get the band members to work up their own parts before Roy gets started as he has an uncanny ability to know what musical direction Springsteen wants to go in. They seem to have a ‘marriage of the minds’, so why not just be married and cut down on the commute time?

#5 Politics in the Promised Land

New Jersey Governor Chris Christie at a Springsteen concert

New Jersey Governor Chris Christie at a Springsteen concert

Springsteen has long been in a love affair with conservative politicians and has lent his talents or songs to campaigns including Ronald Reagan, George W Bush and most recently Rick Santorum. Governor Christie has famously been to over 411 Springsteen concerts over the years and the pair often hold council after concerts to trade stories and policy ideas. For an artist who long ago did a fundraiser for George McGovern and often sided with the left, his views have turned for the worse, and I am sick of hearing about it.

#4 The Voice

Springsteen strains every vocal cord and neck muscle while in concert

Springsteen strains every vocal cord and neck muscle while in concert

OK, we get it. Springsteen’s voice can best be described as a cross between car tires over a gravel road and dogs howling down on main street. Springsteen has made a career trying to pass himself off as a pseudo blue-eyed soul brother with his “power and soul” effects like James Brown, Solomon Burke and Wilson Picket. But I hate to break it to him, but unlike Steve Martin’s character in The Jerk, he was not born a poor black child in the south. He was born to relatively well to do parents in Cherry Hill, NJ, far from the beaches he pretends to love. While singing in a style straight from gospel and soul music, he wants us to shut our eyes to the fact that he is as white as Mitch McConell. Today’s listeners want something more authentic: autotuned singers like Ke$ha. You’re white Springsteen, get over it and sing in the patrician, blue blood manner you come from.

#3 He loves communists, I told you so

Springsteen Morello

I told you in #8 that socialism is a slippery slope. You start out with Candians and their soul crushing tyranny, and then slowly over time, you wind up sleeping with communists deep in the heart of the Kremlin. In his final political transformation, Springsteen has been cast under the spell of known communist agent Tom Morello, recently added to the E Street Band in place of longtime cohort Steven Van Zandt who has been exiled by the politboro to the cold and snow of Norway. Morello has made a career of hypnotizing millions of fans around the world who came to see either Rage Against The Machine or Audioslave and brainwashing them with Marxist dialectics, and now he is doing it to ‘The Boss.’ Springsteen long has been known to end his concerts with the phrase, “We’ll be seeing you up the road.” But for concerts recently played in Australia on the Wrecking Ball tour, Springsteen has now been sending his minions home with the old communist standby, “Workers of the world unite, all you have to lose are your chains.”

#2 Unlike most celebrities, he can’t give a decent speech

How many times have you watched the Grammy or Oscar awards and been blown away by the eloquence and verbal profundity of award winners who speak on the beauty of art, the state of world peace and pressing social issues? This is obviously rhetorical as it happens every year, much to my amazement. Meanwhile, given the opportunity, Springsteen fumbles through the English language more than George W Bush and Gerald Ford combined if they were conjoined twins coming out of sedation. Earlier this year, he gave a speech at the Musicares award ceremony that was a horrific train wreck that left audience members stone faced and confused. I read a transcript of it and haven’t seen that much crap on a single piece of paper since the last Sheryl Crow album. In 2012, Springsteen was given the opportunity to present the keynote address at the South By Southwest Music festival in Austin, Tx. While he had every opportunity to give an amazing seminar on modern music starting with its roots and sources, pay homage to all of his influences including Elvis Presley, James Brown and Bob Dylan, salute Woody Guthrie’s 100th birthday and pinpoint very specific inspirations he had over his career such as The Animals, in the end he did none of that. Instead, he chose to bore the crowd into tears with talk on his new pet projects involving Nintendocore and black death metal music. When presented with an opportunity to speak, Springsteen could rely on his well-known bank of ghost writers, but instead he chooses to display his ignorance and self promotion. What an ass hat!!

#1 Born In The USA…Thanks for ruining a perfectly good war, dude

Yes, I know, I know. Many think this is his most iconic song of his long, illustrious career, but it’s his most misunderstood song and let me tell you of the song’s real meaning. In one sense, the Vietnam War ended in 1975 when the last of the helicopters lifted off the embassy building in Saigon, but in many ways, it has never ended. After the troops came home, they were greeted as liberators and welcomed back into society as the heroes they were. Their stories were told and sung by hundreds of authors and artists. Then Springsteen came along and tried to ride on the coattails of all that had come before him. What the country could have used at the time was an artist willing to take hard look at the rough treatment that some of the veterans received and the difficult lives they led. Instead what we got from the “poet of New Jersey” was a rose-colored fairy tale backed by Bittan’s heavy synthesizer and Weinberg’s militaristic crescendo of drums that became an anthem of blind support for political and military leaders. Springsteen’s USA is at the heart of darkness of this Land of Hope and Dreams we call home. (For anyone who wants a crystal clear understanding of the song and its’ meaning, please read George Will’s riveting account of his one Springsteen concert experience.)

Well, that’s all I have for now and hope many of you agree with me and are willing to stop being ‘blinded by the light’ of an obviously flawed American artist. While we may not listen to each other’s music, let us unite in our repulsion to the music of Bruce Springsteen. All we have to lose are our chains. And as we cast off our chains to Bruce, I will say goodbye to you.

Springsteen yelling at his fans for not liking him enough

Springsteen yelling at his fans for not liking him enough

Honorable mentions: The above were my top 10 reasons I vomit a little in my mouth when thinking of Springsteen and his bandanas and work shirts, but I could have easily come up with 10 or 20 more without even thinking about it and maybe you readers can help me. Below are the ones I anguished over and had to leave off for purposes of this post as I will publish another list when Springsteen comes through town later this year in the hopes of juicing my readership:

The live show: Yeah, yeah. He comes out on stage with the house lights down where nothing exists and then counts down one, two, three and….. presto….. magic happens as over the next 3-4 hours, he gives everything he can of himself in every which way including vocally, musically, lyrically, stage presence, crowd interactions, bonding with everyone until he is left in a state of dripping wet, spent exhaustion. How cliché.

The fans– They are loud, stupid and obnoxious Coors Light swilling grunts. I spend my time being a cool hipster hanging out with my hipster friends. If I wanted to be amongst the unwashed masses, I would go visit them at the unemployment line.

He won’t leave us alone: Can’t we have a national tragedy without this guy showing up to hog the spotlight while acting like he is trying to help out the best way he knows?? Just in the last 12 years, he has appeared on every televised fundraiser including 9/11, the Haiti earthquake, and the 12/12/12 concert for Hurricane Sandy. Hey Bruce, just watch the show on television at home like the rest of us and send a nice check, eh?

38 thoughts on “10 Reasons I Am Repulsed by Bruce Springsteen;) or Lester Bangs’ Hypothesis

    • Jay- Yes, I couldnt have been more of a smart ass. On E Street Radio last week on a call in show, the host read the story and the author called in to defend himself and his thoughts which is fine but he was a complete ass and was dripping in condecension for Bruce and his fans which was the inspiration for this piece.

    • Bruce is a cheater, Patti deserves to be cheated on, what goes around comes around. He was my idle but not after he cheated on his wife with Patti

  1. Ummm… yeah. Springsteen is the Tony Bennett of rock and roll.

    I do agree with #2 somewhat. Artists who collaborate too much can get really tedious, especially when it seems like that is all they can do. McCartney lost his appeal quite a while ago and the only way I can appreciate his performances now, for the most part, is when he collaborates. Even then, he tends to take the other artist down. There are artists who collaborate well, such as Eric Clapton or Sting.

    • Steve- This is pure sarcasm and satire and parody directed towards a writer in Phildelphia who wrote a story on the 10 reasons he hates Springsteen and holds Bruce and his fans in total snobbish disdain. Springsteen is my second favorite musical hero of all time, only behind Elvis. I was afraid my target would be off and it appears I wasnt clear enough in my intentions

      • I actually get your sarcasm and definitely know you are a Springsteen fan (if just from your disdain for the people that walked out at the Wrigley concert).

        Springsteen DOES collaborate too much!

    • It’s called satire. Victor Fiorillo’s original piece was so asinine, vapid, and condescending, it was ridiculous and my blood is still boiling. Sorry of you felt it was disrespectful but how I really feel is the exact opposite of the words laid down. Bruce is my second most favorite musical artist and I hold him and his craft in the highest esteem.

  2. He wasn’t born in Cherry Hill genius. He was born into a family in which his father was a factory worker who struggled to make ends meat. People who hate Bruce are so flawed in their reasoning. Watch his speech inducting U2 into the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame. What does liking Canadiens have to do with anything? He can’t draw a crowd of his own? He’s been performing for 40 fucking years selling out shows across the GLOBE. Every other big artist brings up guest performers. The Rolling Stones actually brought Bruce up on stage recently. And he’s been writing music for so long because people like it and it’s his job. If he stopped making music he’d be devastating millions of people across the planet. If you don’t like his voice, fine. You don’t like how his political views play a role in his music, fine. But don’t make these moronic claims about him that make zero sense at all.

    • Hey genius. Have you ever heard of irony and sarcasm. If you will kindly reread my piece and click on the link to the original piece written by phillymag.com writer Victor Fiorello, you will see that mine was in response to his ridiculous “argument” if one can call it that. Thanks for the taking the time to read it, but you missed the entire mark. I tried to be as ridiculous and over the top as I could and using incorrect “facts” etc. When it was announced that Tom Morello was joining the band for the Australia shows this year, a lot of fans were outraged and some brought up the fact Tom has many leftist political views and that is where the Canadian socialist comments came from and transitioning into the communism bit. I am a longtime, dedicated Bruce fan and personally feel the complete opposite of each of the 10 reasons. Sorry if my sarcasm wasn’t apparent.

  3. I thought your piece was funny. I especially liked the tribute to Lester Bangs. Just wish my family and I could afford concert tickets. Write on!

    • Thank you. Even though I posted it on April Fools Day and thought I was being as over the top as I could many people have read it and thought I was serious. I guess irony can be completely misunderstood. Thanks for taking the time to read it and for sending a response. I am 38 but have been a fan for almost 30 years and have seen him about 8 times over the years and had to save every penny to go. The next time he comes around your part of the world, check out a site called brucefunds.org which is for Bruce fans with extra money and/or tickets who want to help others who can’t afford it get to a concert with free tickets. Rock on!!!

  4. As an inveterate, all-time, dyed-in the-wool, hard-core, die-hard, I’ll-be-damned-if-I-do, Bruce Springsteen ANTI-FAN, I have to apologize, of sorts, to all of you Springsteen nuts out there. You see, it’s not u. . . it’s me. Let me explain. It is utterly impossible for me to give u (simple-minded, one-track-mind folks that u are) a single reason why Springsteen sucks, when I can’t intellectually get past (nor get over) your moronic, baseless reasons for idolizing him , or merely liking him. Your no-matter-what obsession is fucking beyond me. So u see… it’s not me in my well-informed, educated disbelief, but u in your G.E.D.-limited world view. And one more thing: if he’s such a working-class icon, why do u call him “The Boss”—contradictory, eh? Shouldn’t he rather be referred to more as “Bruce the Plumber”, or “Bruce the pizza dough kneader from Original Ray’s around the corner”? But then again, u nut bags don’t care for reason or logic, nor—for that matter— a half-intelligible statement in which to put your usually monosyllabic, knee-jerk response to lines like these. Listen to the hundreds of truly god performers that have preceded Mr. BS in the history of music, the many that are still truly hammering away at it without an iota of recognition, or record-label contract, and then and only then, will u be able to put your disproportionate bias for this man’s music into yardstick perspective. I hate this undeserving prick so so much, I hate New Jersey by simple association. It’s just too bad that when I vacation down south, I have to drive through your fucking wasteland of a state. But cheer up mates! no one bad thing is ever 100% bad. I do thank God for things like Van-Gelder Studios, and WBGO.

    • Thanks for proving Lester Bangs original thesis which is quoted at the top of the post, if you actually took the time to read it instead of just making very general assumptions before your explosion of mental gibberish. I live in the Chicago area, not NJ and I did not write that he is a working class hero. Your tirade is aimed at BS and his fans in general and not at my actual writing. I do not speak for other fans, only myself, and none of your reply has any relevance whatsoever to my views. But I guess thanks for taking the effort to hammer away at someone else’s preference from the safety of your mother’s basement. If you’re ever in Chicago, send me an email so we can make plans so you can try to say what you said here to my face instead of to a computer screen. “In a generation of swine, the one-eyed pig is king.” Hunter Thompson. Merry Christmas!!

  5. I happen to think Bruce flat-out sucks. I know Born in the USA is a scathing indictment of a dying nation; I know he plays for hours every night; I know all the things his fans usually wheel out to deflect any and all criticism of St Bruce of Jersey. I just don’t care, because his music elicits nought from me but a jawbreaking yawn.

    And it really bums me out when I hear of a musician I like and respect—Eddie Vedder, for example, a vocalist and lyricist more talented than ‘The Boss’ (Jesus, what an irritating epithet) could ever hope to be—working with this most tired, clichéd and basic of ‘Rock with a capital R’ musicians.

    Always remember: bosses are assholes.

  6. I was there at the beginning of the Bruce Springsteen phenomenon of youthful college kids standing days in line for concert tickets . . . to me, he’s been nothing but a lot of noise . . . oh sure, he’s had a few good songs, but nothing great. I never got, and still don’t get why people think he has any talent — he doesn’t. He’s a big ego, flapping around the stage playing at being a rock and roll musician . . . its a laughable joke!! A no talent bar band (except for a couple members not named Bruce) that has “pied piper-ed” a couple of million people to feverishly buy his albums and attend his concerts = the lowest common denominator . . .

    • Wow, what a cohesive, intelligent statement. Not. I don’t even want to know what you think good music is.

  7. I know I’m in the minority but I’ve never liked his music. All the critics and fans rave about him. He
    gets four and five star reviews of every album. So obviously I’m not getting it . Every decade I
    think he’s finally fading (ie his “lost” decade the 90s) and then he triumphantly returns.

    I think his singing voice and blue collar poise are really irritating. His songs are simple constructions (but then you can say that about a lot of rockers who are great-Lou Reed and
    Iggy Pop come to mind.) I can honestly say that after giving the new War on Drugs CD a few
    tries and not liking it was because some songs really remind of the way the E street band
    sounds…arena rock cheese.

    It’s hard to understand why so many people love Bruce but I’ve given up trying. Each new
    release baffles me why he is still the huge draw that he definitely is. There are so many
    underappreciated artists who could really use some of the recognition that he gets effortlessly.

  8. Was about to write a hate-filled tirade until I realised you must surely be joking. Bruce is amazing. Nobody compares to him. I went to Rome last July for the sole purpose of watching him at the Ippodromo delle capannelle. It was fantastic, just as his shows I watched in Oslo in the 90s were amazing. I love that man.

    • Thank you for stopping and thinking about it for a moment. I didn’t think I could be any more over the top and still be taken seriously but I was. My whole point was to point out how irrational and patronizing the original article and author were. Springsteen is one of my two favorite musicians and performers and is one of the last of true rock and roll greats. He continues to put out quality albums as he gets older and leaves it all on the stage every concert. Thanks for reading.

  9. Bruce is my favourite artist of all time. I was getting ready to hate you when I read the headline, but I love this and it could only have been written by a true fan. Thanks for giving me a great laugh and confirming why I love the man and his music.

    • Thank you for getting my intent. I didn’t think I could be anymore over the top and still be taken seriously but received many responses thinking this was literal. Yes, Bruce is my second favorite artist and performer and am a true blood fan. As you can tell, my target was the author of the original piece, 10 Reasons I Hate Springsteen, whose writing was filled with snobbish condescension. Bruce is the real deal as a musician, performer and human being and will be long remembered. Thanks.

  10. Bruce jumped the shark after “Darkness on the Edge of Town.” His music was fantastic before, but almost unlistenable after. The music muse left so quickly and completely, it’s hard to understand. I literally camped out in line waiting to buy tickets to his concerts. Now, you couldn’t give give tickets to me.

  11. I can’t tell if it was sarcasm or not but what I can tell is that it was kinda disrespectful and not at all funny. If you were being sarcastic I don’t know how you can call yourself a fan – if you were not being sarcastic don’t bloody write a large article about someone you hate. It doesn’t make sense.

    • Alice- Thanks for reading but apparently I wasn’t sarcastic enough. My entire piece was written as a retort to Vincent Fiorello who is a Philly mag based writer and did a completely snobbish take down of Bruce a few years ago. There is a link to his article embedded in my blog in which you can read his article. Mine was a point by point response to his stupidity and condescension of all things Bruce, his music and most importantly Bruce’s fans. If you aren’t sure of my fan hood of Bruce, please read any one of several other posts on my site speaking high praise of all things Bruce.

  12. I have just seen Bruce last night and he was fantastic! Loved your sarcasm – the Vincent Fiorello article was utterly ridiculous, inane, and didn’t even contain a single decent argument to explain why he ‘hates’ Springsteen. A musician who can go for 3 hours straight at 67 and does absolutely everything to please the fans is definitely a legend!

  13. I have just seen Bruce last night and he was fantastic! Loved your sarcasm – the Vincent Fiorello article was utterly ridiculous, inane, and didn’t even contain a single decent argument to explain why he ‘hates’ Springsteen. A musician who can go for 3 hours straight at 67 and does absolutely everything to please the fans is definitely a legend!

    P.S. I read elsewhere that when his wife Patti is introduced she is often boo-ed…do you know if this is true? and if so, why?

    • She is not well respected by a lot of hard core fans. They don’t think she can sing well, play instruments with any ability or adds anything to the show. Not saying I agree with that assessment but that’s what I’ve heard. I don’t think I’ve heard any boos at shows when she is introduced but there is definitely a negative vibe from a large contingent of fans. I also think some of them think she was part of the reason Bruce broke up ESB in 1989.

  14. Fuck all you losers who are Bruce haters. You’re probably Justin Bieber fans. You don’t know a good musician from a hole
    in the ground. Bruce is a legend.

    • A legend in his own mind. He was a created rock star just like those movies show. Read a book, the Mansion on the Hill. Tells the story of how Bruce was made.

  15. All scarcasm asides, you can’t get anywhere near the Bruce machine and not get dirty. Stumble through the attempted humor but you hit the nail on the head more times than Bruce gets help from real musicians. The same way the rock media launched and maintained other bs like punk rock, which is total bs rock with only accidental talent involved, jerking guitars like a prick, Bruce won’t go away because rock media is based on bs not quality. Bruce is a household name when other much more talented rockers are almost unknown born in the USA. Indeed. Land of the quantity of BS.

  16. bruce you suck you just dont, know how bad you have just taken from good americans and you suck you just take you are a low pic of shit

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